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Important Announcement!

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as “Euro-English”.

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of “k”.  This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.  There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f”.  This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent “e” in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou;” and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Z e drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
——

Thanks matalexwolf for this important message! :-)

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Posted on January 27, 2008 · Filed Under News 

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  1. lividemerald on April 4th, 2008 1:04 pm

    Wow! Comments can be edited now! That’s a feature that will prove very useful! Wonderful!

  2. lividemerald on April 4th, 2008 1:02 pm

    This made the e-mail rounds some time back, so I’ve already read it. But it is very clever and quite humorous, and I enjoyed reading it again. :smile:

  3. dvdpage on April 4th, 2008 12:14 pm

    got a good laugh. Tahnks again.

  4. dieter on March 13th, 2008 4:28 am

    Luvd it.

  5. marinas morris on February 14th, 2008 1:06 am

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-36Rn1wN50 German Coastguard

    matalexwolf replied on March 13th, 2008 7:47 pm:

    Hey, M Morris, how are you?

    good one for this! has been, seems like ages since able to log on again. zee germans, are plenty of late!!!!!!!! mind you, and somewhat thankfully, i am not a german! : not a problem if i were but, greatful, none the less……
    my father! not furer, wa so into zee germans, language , piano and everythig…..i got lost after cassette one, just kept jumpping into Bazil Faulty and goose stepping about,…….!!!!!!!
    anyhoo, thanx again, andisnt Miss Hot For Words amazing? wow, just cant get enough :)

    have many words love to explore…. is it bad to have grown up with a dictionary as a youth? i so cose a nite in with words than pizza and poker at times……

    be well, love to everyone

    mat x

  6. angelwest on February 11th, 2008 11:36 pm

    How serios is vis?

  7. justgetalife6 on February 9th, 2008 8:40 pm

    zat vas very funy

  8. jsmooth5atl on February 3rd, 2008 9:37 pm

    O Rly ? :lol:

  9. hijump on January 31st, 2008 8:11 am

    ja vol!! :twisted:
    I vil praktis zo I can spek and vrit corektly! :cool:

  10. jeordiegallup on January 27th, 2008 9:39 pm

    that was excelent! :mrgreen:

  11. quepasakoolj18 on January 27th, 2008 3:51 pm

    Hah ha! That was really interesting and funny!

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