'Pun my word « HotForWords Forums

HotForWords Forums » HotForWords General

'Pun my word

(63 posts)

Started 9 months ago by Evan Owen
Latest reply from Evan Owen

Tags:

12 3 Next »

Evan Owen
Member

'PUN MY WORD

This forum is for HFW fans who delight in wordplay: puns, bilingual puns, doble-entendres, folk etymology, tall tales about words, daffynitions, humorously creative new meanings for old words, funny new words to describe our changing times and technology. Posts can be as corny as "The Mountain Man's Guide to Computer Terminology" ("Log on": part of the phrase "throw another log on the fire, it's getting chilly!"), or as subtly sophisticated as Fractured French ("Chargé d’affaires = The cost of infidelity")

We could try games such as "guess the pun," e.g.
Q: "What's the slogan of the Sierra Club's campaign to extend Second Amendment rights to grizzlies?"
A: "Support the right to arm bears."

Also, I realized that my "Fractured Philology" posts ("eufemmism: something nice women say") needed their own spot when it was pointed out that the people who think SHIT is an acronym ("Ship High In Transit") might take them seriously.

Which brings me to an important point: THIS IS NOT A FORUM FOR SERIOUS SCHOLARSHIP, UNLESS ACCOMPANIED BY A LUDICROUS OR FRIVOLOUS TWIST. ANYONE CAUGHT TARNISHING THIS FORUM'S REPUTATION BY POSTING RESPECTABLY STUDIOUS COMMENTS WILL BE FLAMED ON SIGHT! This is for the protection of all participants, so that we can indulge our flights of fancy without worry that anyone will take us seriously.

Acknowledgement goes to Bob Morris for inspiring this forum with his "Poulet vous francais?" comeback to the question, "Why do we say [pardon my French] when we use fowl language?" Thanks also to Chemikal for his idea of "Elliptic English" ("prudent - prune extract toothpaste") and his motto/slogan, "Let’s mess with the words shall we?"

To conclude with a quote from 0ceans1ze "Well, my coffee break is over = Café au lait"

Posted 9 months ago #
Bob
Member

***FRACTURED FRENCH***
Franglais for Dummies.

Your starters for ten.
From Evan Owen:
Coup de grâce…………mow the lawn
J’y suis, et j’y reste!….I’m Swiss, and I’m staying the night
Garde-toi……………….chastity belt

From Bob:
La vie en rose = The aircraft took off.
Entante cordiale = My aunt has fallen in the lime juice.
C’est la vie = I say, Darling.
Tres drole = The distance moved by a car tire during one complete revolution.
Je ne sais quoi = I’m not telling you what it is.
Au naturelle = Rain or well water.
Aide-de-camp = Hey! Buzz off.
Chargé d’affaires = The cost of infidelity.
Eau de toilette = The W.C, stinks.
Cuisine minceur = Yesterday’s left-overs minced up in the gravy.
Confrère = My brother is a thick, stupid idiot.
lèse majesté = read my jokes.

From 0ceans1ze:
faux pas = not as lucky as a rabbit’s foot
Grand prix = price after taxes
Sacré bleu = uncomfortable state brought on by having your genitals overstimulated without release
Well, my coffee break is over = Café au lait
pas de quoi = give me a goldfish
Salut! = woman of loose virtue
A plus tard = another way of saying “you fail”
c’est pas grave = don’t have a heart attack
lèse majesté = just kidding around, JEEZ
chacun ses goûts = OK, OK - buzzing…

From Che Volay:
culotte de baggie - baggie pants

From Capman911:
Coup de Grace = a kind of sports car. (Belonging to Grace Kelly? -Bob)

Posted 9 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

From Chemikal:
Tu me manques… Tummy ache

***ELLIPTIC ENGLISH***(also from Chemikal)

Common English words or phrases and their misinterpretations.
Let’s mess with the words shall we?

embrace - getting a new pair of braces
prudent - prune extract toothpaste
unseal - the process in which a seal is stripped of its sealness
microscope - “buy more bubble gum”
holy ground - ground full of holes
lead - something you see on “le TV”

Posted 9 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

***LossForWords presents another Fractured Philology lesson:
“McNaught and Hidalgo”***

Why is the Irish name McNaught the opposite of the Spanish Hidalgo? LossForWords must instigate!

In 1588, Spain sent the Armada to invade England, and was soundly beaten in a naval battle in the English Channel. The remnant ships of the Armada found themselves at the eastern end of the Channel, blocked by the English navy from returning home to Spain. They then undertook to return the long way via Scotland. The fleet was further decimated by a storm off the west of Ireland, resulting in a number of Spanish soldiers swimming ashore (which is why there is now a Clan McLopez in Ireland.)

On receiving news of the wreck and Spanish survivors, a group of English soldiers was dispatched to Galway to, er, dispatch the Spanish. Now, among the Spanish were a number of hidalgos, minor nobles, whose title is an abbreviation of hijo de algo, literally “son of something.” When caught, one of these men protested that he was, in fact, a local Irishman.

“What’s your name, then?” challenged the English.

The Spaniard replied with the first thing that came to mind: “McAught!,” a translation of his Spanish title, being a combination of the Irish mac, “son of,” and the archaic English aught, “something.”

“As an Irishman, you’re a McNaught!” (i.e. son of nothing), sneered the English; and, amused with their jest, let him go. The name stuck, and the name “McNaught” survives to this day as a hidden reminder of the bedraggled survivor of the Spanish Armada.

It’s true, I tell you!

Posted 9 months ago #
Che Rambler
Member

Go fried = Go for ride
Jeweat, no jew = did you eat, no did you

Posted 9 months ago #
stebakle
Member

Deja vu - Monday

Posted 9 months ago #
Bob
Member

à gogo = In the beginning
à la carte = it's on the cards
à propos = asking for the hand in marriage
apéritif = set of dentures
après moi, le déluge = I'm fleeing a Tsunami
au courant = swimming
au fait = at the fair
au pair = buxom, well endowed up front

Posted 9 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

J'ai grand appetite = big G, little a

Posted 9 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

Ruptured Romanian (apologies to Chemikal)

Bucharest = tired of reading
dragostea = get back, fire-breathing lizard!
haiduc = stoned nobleman
ochii = alright
fericirea = hurray, the boat's here!

Posted 9 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

Ruptured Russian (apologies to Marina)
Волга (Volga)…………….uncouth
снег идёт (sneg idyot)……fool in the snow
хорошо (khorosho)……….fright flick
товарищ (tovarisch)………excessively wealthy
человек (chelovek)………..Vic plays the ’cello

Posted 9 months ago #
Greatest Potential
Member

"Tw"

twitterpated (adj.) infatuation, romantically excited, aroused by sensations
it's not as though you literally have butterflies fluttering around inside your belly.

perineum: area between the butthole and genitals OR
""tw"
twitter: the piece of skin between your balls and asshole

Then there's BEANIE SIGEL's PURPLE RAIN song. A virtual treasure trove of drug slang and intoxicated blubberage:

[Deep Voice]
Caution
Do Not Mix Wit Alcohol
It May Cause Drowsyness
Keep Out Of Reach Of Small Children

(Verse 1: Beanie Sigel)
I Roll It Back, Crack A Dutch, Have A Sizip
Get Introduced To This Drink That I Sizip
Promethazine, Wit Codine? Thats My Twizist
It Might Lean U To The Left, Or Make U Izitch
The Pearl Meth Wit The Tuss Some Like The Mizix
Caught Into They Phsyics, & How They Wanna Dizip
Yo Becareful, It Aint Ya Ordinary Liquid
The First Time U Sip It, U Mite Get Addicted
Matter Of Fact, I Know Ur Gonna Get Addicted
Cause Its So Sweet.Life Liquid, Plus Its Good For Ur Sickness
I Used To Watch My Uncle Sip It
Goin Through Itz That. In My Grandmothers Kitchen
Head In His Lap, Grandmom Bitchin
Pocket Full Of Scrap, Plus Scratchin & Itchin
Back When They Sip Broma Smoked Cheeba
Took doggys fours and two receive'ahs
This One Is For My Real Mug Mixers
Who Get Screwed Up, My Thick Juice Sippers
Shout Out, To My Man Lil Flip
Big Mo, Project Pat & The Whole 3 - 6
Yea I Know About Them Texas Boys
Who Keep A Liter In The Cup, & A Heater In The Tuck
Think The Xanax & The Endo Sack, Make Me Slack?
Cocktailed Or V'd Up, Gettin Swiss Cheesed Up

"tw" in this instance is twizurp
smoking crystal meth

however the term twizist is used instead.
perhaps a slang word that describes drinking crystal meth bong water(?)

there's plenty more dope material to dissect in that song so if you want some good hearty laughs do have a go at it

(Chours : Rell)
Please Dont Blow My Highhhhhhhhh
(Blow My Highhhhh)
When Im Sippin That Purple Rainnnnnn
(Beanie: Dont Blow My High
Trust Me U Dont Know My Life)
Nigga Dont Blow My Highhhh, Dont Blow My Highhhhhhh
When Im Tippin That Purple Rainnnnnn
I Know It Makes Em Crazy, It Keeps Me Lazy...

(Verse 2: Bun B (UGK)
When Back In 94 When Screw Still Had His Gate Up
He Called Me Over To His House & He Poured Me A 8 Up
I Asked Him What It Was He Said Bun Get Ya Weight Up
This Is Lean, Them White Folks Call It Promethazine
Shit But We Gonna Probably Drink Dawg Cuz Thats What We Be Doin To It
Now Take This Big Red & Pour About A 2 Into It
I Did 2's & 8's, What The Fuck Is U Trippin On?
He Said Man Thats The Ounces Of Cough Syrup That U Sippin On
So Shit I Poured It I Sipped It, Then I Sipped Some Mo
I Fired Up A Green Monster, & I Hit That Hoe
Started Relaxin, Shit & To My Surprise
I Was Noddin Out Lookin At The Back Of My Eyes
They Tried To Wake Me Up But Shit I Just Kept Yawnin
I Fell Out Of My Chair & Woke Up There The Next Mornin
God Bless My Nigga, Cause Its Then I Been Spoiled
On My White Muddy, Cup Of Texas Tea, That R

(Chours : Rell)
Please Dont Blow My Highhhhhhhhh
(Blow My Highhhhh)
When Im Sippin That Purple Rainnnnnn
(Beanie: Dont Blow My High
Trust Me U Dont Know My Life)
Nigga Dont Blow My Highhhh, Dont Blow My Highhhhhhh
When Im Tippin That Purple Rainnnnnn
I Know It Makes Em Crazy, It Keeps Me Lazy...

(Verse 3: Beanie Sigel & Bun B )
Beanie: I Roll It Back, Crack A Dutch, Have A Sizip
Get Introduced To This Leaf In My Spliziff
No Stems, No Seeds, No Stizzicks
The Ultimate, Expierence Like Jimmy Hendrix
I Like To Roll Up, Cowboy Tradition
Or Burn A Peace Pipe, & Cythe Like The Injins
Or Burn A Big Spliff, Bob Marley Stile
Buffalo Soldier, Rosta Farey Stile
Smokes On Pizurp
(Bun B: We Sipz On Syzurp)
Get It By The 8, By The Pint
(Bun B: Or By The Kizurp)
Some Might Take Ya High, Or A Down
(Bun B: Or A Bizurp)
Whatever U Can Stand, Floats Ur Boat
(Unknown: Makes Ya Twizurp)
Yes I Fucks Wit U If U Smoke On Green
(Bun B: Or Sip On Lean)
Yea Whatever, Click Or Teen
(Bun B: Strip For A Scene)
Nigga Burn A Spliff One Time
(Bun B: Say Bean & Swing Ya Big Body Benz
& Ima Swing Mine)

(Chours : Rell)
Please Dont Blow My Highhhhhhhhh
(Blow My Highhhhh)
When Im Sippin That Purple Rainnnnnn
(Beanie: Dont Blow My High
Trust Me U Dont Know My Life)
Nigga Dont Blow My Highhhh, Dont Blow My Highhhhhhh
When Im Tippin That Purple Rainnnnnn
I Know It Makes Em Crazy, It Keeps Me Lazy...

(Bun B)
Dedicated To Real Syrup Sippers
Boys Wit Big White Cups
Man They Doin It Mayn and 10 Years Plus
Dedicated to that mayne Screw, my boy Fat Pat, my boy Big Steve
my boy Big Melo R.I.P.
them boiz poured up real
big when they were here, you what i'm sayin
wassup young pimp we miss you mayne
come on home
i'mma pour a paint just for you
.................etc.
Screwed Up Click, we in here
manye hold up, I promise i'm throwed
hold up, wassup young wee, the fingerz in here baby
ey ya'll gonna have to cut this off..I can't do nothing

Posted 9 months ago #
stebakle
Member

Jamais Vu- Old-fashioned sleepwear with a flap in the back.
Faux Pax- Not your real dad.

Posted 9 months ago #
Bob
Member

@ stebakle
Wouldn't "Faux Pas " be "not your real Dad(s)"?
Faux pax = Not your real passengers i.e. Hijackers.

Posted 9 months ago #
Bob
Member

More fractured French
au jus = in the synagogue.
avant garde = waiting at the gates of Buckingham Palace for the Changing of the Guard.
beau geste = That's a good one!
bureau de change = A new desk.
beaux esprits = Fine single malts.
billets doux = Billy's ducks.
ça ne fait rien = broken/out of order.
cherchez la femme = expensive womens' boutique.
boutique = Womens' shoe shop.
cordon sanitaire = Tassel on a tampon.
coup d'œil = A cup of oil.
haute couture = Saucy costumes.
haute cuisine = Spicy food.
haut monde = Global warming.
hors de combat = Artillery horse.
laïcité = Apple company headquarters.
mal de mer = Bad mother.
ménage à trois = swimming with two friends.
le moment suprême = orgasm.
noblesse oblige = Mary J. is unhurt.
pas de trois = My wife won't agree to a threesome.
pastiche = Naked.
pot-au-feu = Smoking marijuana.
quoi de neuf = One of nine Japanese Golden Carp.
sans-culottes = Going commando.
soupçon = A small portion of soup for the male offspring.
tant mieux = My aunt is being catty.
tant pis = My aunt has gone to the Ladies room.
tout de suite = One selling exorbitantly priced sweets.
vin de pays = Commercial vehicle for rent.

Posted 8 months ago #
Greatest Potential
Member

@Bob
"Faux pas" is a term french in origin which literally means "false step"

best foot forward
A favorable initial impression: He always has his best foot forward when speaking to his constituents.

hot hatch is slang for a high-performance automobile (hatchback)
though I've also heard it's a slang term for a way to go about bonking skinny fashion models when sat naked on a chair facing away from their sex partner.

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

@greatestpotential
1. 'Best foot forward' does not mean 'A favorable initial impression'; it means 'to use all your efforts and resources to their best effect in order to achieve a desired result'.
2. Re; 'faux pas' - I know! Please (re)read the first post in this forum, particularly "THIS IS NOT A FORUM FOR SERIOUS SCHOLARSHIP, UNLESS ACCOMPANIED BY A LUDICROUS OR FRIVOLOUS TWIST. ANYONE CAUGHT TARNISHING THIS FORUM'S REPUTATION BY POSTING RESPECTABLY STUDIOUS COMMENTS WILL BE FLAMED ON SIGHT!", and then offer your most sincere, abject, grovelling apology for attempting to introduce a grain of sanity and accuracy to this haven of ridicule and nonsense.
When writing your apology, don't forget to offer us all the afore-mentioned licker-ish and/or liquor-ish twist. (Yum yum!)

Posted 8 months ago #
cufan71
Member

UNITED
Uni-Ted means One Ted

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

FLY UNITED means Ted is clever because he went to Uni.

Posted 8 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

LossForWords presents another Fractured Philology lesson:
EUPHEMISM

(Originally posted in the comments under "Contumelious")

Hello my dear students. Today we have another word request. Dickhead793, dickhead1422, and dickhead437, and at the HFW website, hotformarina1375, hotformarina649, and hotformarina520, all wanted to know the origin of the word "euphemism".

In the days before YouTube, people used to try to find polite ways of saying rude things, instead of vice-versa. The polite phrases used in this odd custom were called euphemisms. Which is an odd name for a polite phrase, since “you fem!” is an insult men hurl at each other to start a fight. What is going on here, guys? LossForWord must instigate.

The term euphemism dates back to the time of the Norman Conquest of England in 1066. The invading French soldiers, looking for wives and mistresses, were appalled at the crude speech of the Saxon women, and attempted to teach them polite speech; for example, to say merde in place of shitte. These polite words and phrases to be used in place of rude Saxonisms became known as eufemmisms, a word compounded from the Greek eu meaning “good,” the French femme, meaning “woman,” and ism, a suffix meaning “pertaining to” – that is, speech used by “good” women when referring to rude things. In time, as Norman French and Anglo-Saxon blended to become English, the word eufemmism worked its way into common usage, with the meaning changed to mean polite expressions, whether used by women OR men.

Later, while compiling his Dictionary of the English Language, Dr. Samuel Johnson changed the spelling to “euphemism,” just to be quirky.

Of course, with the dawn of the Internet and YouTube, young people are now rejecting euphemisms and reverting to traditional Anglo-Saxonisms.

There you go – another mystery compounded by your dubious LossForWords.
For your homework – do you think women who talk dirty are HOT – or DISGUSTING? Please write your answers in the comments below. I’ll see you all in the distant future. Until Marina gets back, be good – class? CLASS?? [unseen class starts throwing pencils, erasers, paper airplanes, and apples at substitute teacher.]

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

@Euvan Owen, alias LossForWords,
This explains a lot! It was obviously the first example of the French attempting to impose their will and culture on the rest of Europe, and therefore the first sign that the British were going to have to subject themselves to the European Eunion's legislative attempts to Euradicate our insular individuality.

Posted 8 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

Greek tailor: "Euripides?"
Tailor's customer: "Eumenides?"

Posted 8 months ago #
Greatest Potential
Member

@Bob

okay, i apawl-o-jize. before you get too heinz 57 bold and tryun shame me by placing me in shackles in the town square

1)faux pas are what sexy vixens use to dial their seal phones with
2)chris k. ringle is from california and that is his santa moniker
3)1000 islands has a dressing, okay, we've established that already, yet i've searched and searched on the internet and have yet to find any maps which identify the whereabouts of these thousand islands. not even a name list for the islands, so where would they be listed???

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

@greatestpotential
Funny you should mention BOLD and Thousand Islands in the same post, as one of the stories about 1000 Islands Dressing is that George Boldt, of Waldorf-Astoria Hotel fame, popularized it by instructing his maitre d'hotel, Oscar Tschirky, to put the dressing on the hotel's menu. Boldt had a home called Boldt Castle on one of the Thousand Islands, which is the name of an archipelago of islands that straddle the U.S.-Canada border in the Saint Lawrence River as it emerges from the northeast corner of Lake Ontario.
Boldt Castle is located on Heart Island, at 44° 20' 43"N and 75° 55' 27"W, so whether it was his boldt hole from the hectic life or whether he had been jilted by his Valentine and was suffering from a bolt through the heart I don't know.
As to your other points, I shall now always wonder if Fauxy Ladies are real or transvestites.
And talking of Santa's monikers, what do solicitors/lawyers call Santa's Little Helpers? Subordinate Clauses.

Posted 8 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

LossForWords presents another Fractured Philology lesson:

How the Stillaguamish River Got its Name

English, Spanish, and native Salish compounded into one place-name? How can that be? LossForWords must instigate.

Some two hundred years ago, two voyages of exploration entered the waters of the Salish Sea, the beautiful inland arm of the Pacific now shared by British Columbia and Washington State: one English under George Vancouver, and one Spanish under Francisco Eliza.

On both expeditions were sailors who looked out at the pristine landscape and bountiful sea, and weighed the prospect of the return trip – of months at sea, braving hurricanes and scurvy, to return home to rat-and-flea infested hovels – against the possibilities of starting over in this beautiful new land; and a few sailors from both expeditions abandoned ship.

On encountering each other, these two groups of Spanish and English first reacted with hostility and suspicion. Then cooler heads prevailed, reasoning that they had more in common as deserters trying to survive in a new land, than differences as Spanish and English, and that their hostilities belonged to the life they had left behind. Accordingly, the groups joined forces to map out their strategy for their new lives.

For a permanent settlement, they would need wives. Some sailors had been wise enough to take trade goods from their ships, and soon they approached the native Salish to trade steel knives, beads, and colored cloth for klootchman kopa elip tillikum, native women. The band then set out to find a place for a permanent settlement, finally building a village by a large, quiet pond behind a huge logjam on one of the local rivers.

As a generation went by, the languages of these settlers – English, Spanish, and Salish – became blended into one. The name they gave themselves and their village by the quiet water later became applied to the entire river by which they had settled: the Stillaguamish, from the English still, Spanish agua (water), and Salish mish (people): the people of the quiet water.

There you go, another mystery compounded by your dubious LossForWords!

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

From the above post we can also deduce that the Snohomish were Eskimos who travelled down the Inside Passage from Alaska and the Yukon during the last ice age and took their name from the igloos in which they dwelt.
Mish = people
Igloo = a house made of snow; a Snow Home
Therefore The people of the snow Homes.
A shaggy dog story further compounded by your perfidious words-myth.

Posted 8 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

Garbled German

Achtung = morning mouth
Anschluss = wet snow
Autobahn = no motorized vehicles
Bauhaus = dog shelter
Fuhrer = ruckus
Gemeinschaft = hole in the ground leading to valuable minerals or ores
Gestalt = no more visitors
Gotterdammerung = Deus irae
Herrenvolk = cranes mating
Junker = '78 Honda Civic
Kaputt = the ball's right by the hole

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

Dreadful Deutche
Achtung, Spitfire! = Morning mouth with a sore throat.
Wagner = Truck Driver.
Wie heißen mann? = Where is the elevator?
Bitte = Beer.
Bitte schön = A light beer for the ladies.
Bratwurst = Children behaving badly.
Sauerkraut = Miserable bastard.
Ist es weit vin heir? = Is this white wine?

Posted 8 months ago #
Greatest Potential
Member

not quite sure what a wongle is.....oohhhhhhh....wouldntcha like to know?

a wingle swings with singles in single bars. favorite snack: cinnamon candy bears

Wondle Weighin is a splonge wongler from Whererufrumweather Wontona who twitters with wetty petties who nerdalogue afterhours underneath sweddy teddy bare bed sheets with their bedroom windows open in the dark.

nerdalogueses are fixated to any gadget that has glowing lights that beep & bloop.

Posted 8 months ago #
Evan Owen
Member

***LossForWords’ FRACTURED PHILOLOGY presents a mini-lesson :
How Barry Became Barack (Inaugural edition)***

A few months ago, Newsweek ran an article entitled, “How Barry Became Barack.” Discontent with their explanation, I did my own research and discovered the following:
President Obama was known as Barry until he was a young man and went on a trip to Japan. Now, “Obama” is also a Japanese name. There was another Mr. Obama at the conference he attended, leading to some confusion between the two. Thus for clarity, one of the Japanese hosts began to refer to the American as the “Black Obama.” Of course, with a Japanese accent, “Black” is pronounced “Barack.” Obama took a liking to it, perhaps since the name means “lightning” in Hebrew and “blessing” in Arabic, and has called himself “Barack” ever since.

There you go — another mystery compounded by your dubious LossForWords.

Afterthought: I have uncovered NO evidence that President O’Bama is "Black Irish"

Posted 8 months ago #
Bob
Member

If he were 'Black Irish', he'd be 'Barra Armada', wooden he?

Posted 8 months ago #

RSS feed for this topic

12 3 Next »

Reply »

You must log in to post.